"After so many years observing people (and myself!) in the complicated game of love, I can say this: often times, you don’t fall in love with a person. You fall in love with something else.
Most often, people fall in love with their own imagination of the perfect man/woman. You meet somebody, you barely know him/her, and then you start imposing your own ideals of a soulmate onto the person. Problem begins when the illusion starts to shatter, and you start to see ‘the real him/her’. And tragically, you accuse the person of ‘having changed’ – although it was your own eyes which finally opened.
Often times, people fall in love not with a person, but a “way out”. You are feeling lonely, you just don’t want to be alone and miserable, and you see this person as a ‘solution’. Then, you are falling in love with the solution to your problem, not with a person.
Some people fall in love with “agenda”. You have made plans for your life: when to find a partner, when to get married, when to have children, etc. And then you see this person as the fulfilment of your life’s “Outlook calendar”. Again, you are falling in love with your life schedule, not with a person.
Some others fall in love with “therapy”. You were broken inside, you have mental scars, you have childhood trauma. And then you find this person whom you think can cure you. Then, you are falling in love with the therapy for your own soul illness, not with a person.
And few lucky ones, find that one person, see his/her true soul, and fall in love. Few lucky ones, fall in love, with a person."
Sudah lama ga ngeblog dan baca blog, saya pagi ini tergiring ke blog Om Piring. One of my fav socmed person. I love reading his blog and sometimes his shity things. Make me feel I am a normal person.
Kembali ke isi blog di atas. Penjabaran si Om Piring tentang fall in love ini membuat saya merenung dan (akan) berpikir panjang. Bukan karena saya tiba-tiba ragu akan rasa cinta saya kepada kekasih hati. Tidak sama sekali. Tapi karena saya merasa menemukan moment di mana semua pertanyaan saya tentang keraguan rencana-rencana ke depan terjawab setidaknya, sedikit melalui tulisan dia.
I am falling in love with this person. Mathew Taylor. And I don't feel lonely, miresable, or worse as a way out of all problems.
In fact, walaupun sekarang kami dipisahkan oleh jarak di belahan bumi yang berbeda. Saya bahagia dan lega. Dan rasa cinta saya semakin tumbuh besar dan kuat. Mungkin karena saya memang tidak menuntut dan mengharapkan apa-apa sekarang. Mungkin karena saya sudah mulai mengerti arti ikhlas yang sebenarnya. Mungkin karena saya memang jatuh cinta pada dia. Bukan pada orang-orang di sekeliling kami. Saya menerima dan mencintai dia apa adanya.
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